Turtle Soup
by Gatomongamer
Summary: Bowser finds something new on the menu, turtle soup


This was the smash mansion, a prestigious place where only the best fighters the universe has to offer, no matter their allegiance, gather to engage in scheduled fights to determine who is the best. When not fighting these fighters stayed in rooms befitting a five star hotel all tailored to their own personal wants and needs and they would be free to wander and socialize with their fellow smashers. The smash mansion was run by the two brothers Master Hand and Crazy Hand, embodiments of both creation and destruction. At the current moment however, this image of the smash mansion was the polar opposite of what it was rumored to be.

It was chaotic, a group of people of all shapes, sizes, colors, and species were gathered. Some were shouting, others were waving money in the air and all of it was directed at four people sitting at a table. They were, in order, a large ape with brown fur and a red tie with the initials DK, a short fat man with a zig zag mustache wearing ripped clothing, a large blue penguin wearing a crown, and an even larger dragon like creature with a spiked turtle shell.

They were Donkey Kong, the hero of donkey kong islands; Wario, the greedy anti Mario; King Dedede, self proclaimed king of dreamland; and Bowser, the Koopa king. They were continuously stuffing their faces full of strawberry pies, adding to the mountain of dirty bowls and plates behind them. They were doing this because today was the 15th annual Super Smash Brother eating contest and only the best of the best dare enter.

On the sidelines two smashers stared longingly at the food on the table, they were a pink puffball and a green dinosaur. Kirby and Yoshi wished they could enter but they were forbidden, there would just be no competition.

Bowser was feeling great as he powered through his last few pies, he was going to win for sure, he could see the others getting tired. Once again the table was completely cleared and the competitors were ready for the next course.

"Okay smashers, as we all now I'm adding a new dish to the smash menu, and I decided when better to reveal what it is than at our annual eating competition", Master Hand announced over the noise.

A bunch of covered platters came floating towards the table, courtesy of MasterHand's magic. When they reached the table they uncovered revealing a type of soup. Without missing a beat Bowser immediately put a spoonful into his mouth. It tasted delicious, nice and hot with tender meaty parts.

"The new item added to the menu, it Turtle Soup!", Master Hand yelled.

Bowser froze in his seat while his fellow competitors dug in.

"Turtle soup...turtle soup...turtle soup, Oh My God!", his thought echoed in his head before realization of what he'd done struck him. He immediately spat out what he had in his mouth, hitting some unlucky people who were too close. He started scrubbing his tongue using his hands.

"Bowser what are you doing?! Look how far they are ahead of you!", Ganondorf yelled waving his money in the air.

It was true, everyone else was already on their third plate and he'd barely touched his first. Bowser stared apprehensively at his own plate, as he picked up another spoonful.

"I bet money on you, you better win!", Ganondorf commanded.

His arm shakes as he brought it up to his mouth.

"Nope, nope, can't do this", Bowser admitted in his mind dropping his spoon, it felt like he was eating his own people, turtles were his ancestors!

Bowser started to feel very sick, as his skin turned a few shades lighter by this point people noticed that their was something wrong with him.

"I don't feel so good...", the world started swirling before his eyes, he retreated back into his shell and promptly fell over into a dead faint.

"It's super effective, Bowser fainted.", Pokemon trainer whispered while the others either checked up on Bowser or cursed about their lost money.

The next day

A disembodied right hand floated along the hallways. This was Master Hand and he was in a good mood, the day was half over and nothing was blown up, burnt, chopped, drowned, eaten or otherwise destroyed. The loud blaring of an alarm broke him from his good mode, he knew what that alarm meant so he rushed to the storage room where all the food was kept. He had it installed to prevent certain smashers, cough kirby cough Yoshi, from sneaking in and eating all the food.

He arrived to see a crowd gathered around the door to the room. They all cleared out of his way when they saw how annoyed he was, it was strange how much emotion you could see on a hand but you get use to it. He expected to see the usual gluttons making of with the food, even the Pikmin try it at least once a month this was definitely not what he expected.

There was a large, suspiciously cannonball shaped hole in the wall revealing the outside world and Bowser was standing next to it apparently overseeing the break out of all the turtles. The turtles themselves were being carried out on the backs of goombas and koopas through the hole and to an awaiting airship.

"Go my brethren, be free!", Bowser yelled as the last couple of turtles were carried out.

"Thank you King Bowser, our saviour!"? The turtles yelled back tears in their eyes.

If Master Hand had a face it would have developed a twitch by now.

"Bowser!", Master Hand yelled in pure anger.

Bowser gulped audibly, he swore there was a thunder cloud hover over Master Hands head, actually never mind it's definitely there.

"Poyo?", kirby hesitantly poked it wondering if it was a relative of Kracko.

Bowser weighted his options. Stay here and face his punishment like a man or make a run for it. He retracted into his shell and shell dashed through the hole, he was faster like this.

"Wait for me!", he screamed, screw being a man, he would of course come back but Master Hand would hopefully be in a better mood by then.

"What is going on here!", yelled another hand as it floated in. It was Crazy Hand, Master Hand's brother.

"I leave to spend one week with friend the Pyro on the Rainbow isles and this is what I come back to", he set down his novelty ballonicorn and gestured to the hole in the wall," Everyone playing smash the wall without me."

He then started smashing himself into the wall and within seconds everyone joined him. Ten minutes later the hole mansion was rubble. master Hand just sighed and collapsed unto the ground, he'll fix the mansion tomorrow, right now he just wanted to sleep.

Needless to say they never served turtle based food at the mansion again.


End file.
